Hamburgers

I've calmed down since last night.

Thank god. I was a walking ball of fire, seriously.

After my call to the insurance company, I frantically emailed and instant messaged the HR benefits rep at my company and she actually *seemed* (although I don't trust it) concerned about the denial and said she would get on it right away. In fact, she even told me I'd get some kind of a response from her this morning. I'll believe it when I see it.

After that, I left work and on my way home Libby texted me to tell me that even though she was required to fill out her consent-to-ship form again, her clinic was waiving their usual requirement of it being notarized. Good news! She also asked me how things were going on my side with the insurance. Unfortunately, things weren't going very well yesterday. I told her about the denial, and since I was driving, I was dictating my texts to her with the voice recognition feature on my phone. My text ended up something like this:

"I am so glad they are letting you waive the notary for the new form. I can't wait to get these precious hamburgers here!"

Hamburgers! LOL My phone thought I said hamburgers.

I am a few hamburgers short of a happy meal, that's for sure. I got a laugh out of it and it lifted the feeling of frustration for a bit. Moments after that, I saw my phone was downloading a photo from Libby. As it appeared on my screen, I realized it was a picture of her four beautiful children laying on a blanket on the grass. Underneath the photo she said "Believe in miracles, Liz. These are mine."

Tears. This changed my perspective completely. She brought all of this fighting full circle. It's so easy to get caught up in the frustrating details and lose focus. She fought for each one of her babies, and now I'm fighting for mine. This was such a moment of encouragement for me.

One day I will have my miracles too.

I've always known that embryo adoption was special, but at that moment I was reminded again as to how special it really is. Both of my donors are amazing women and I can't imagine going through something like this without them.

When I got home, I completely lost my marbles and ranted and raved about the insurance problems to Kevin. I told him about my proposal to move forward out of pocket and try to recoup costs later.

He agreed. Easily, might I add.

That's it. EFF insurance. For now, at least. This is something that is clearly outlined in my summary plan description as a covered benefit. My HR department agrees. There is not one good reason why it is being denied, and I feel confident we will be able to recover most, if not all of it. We can involve an attorney, if needed. But I'm not letting this ruin my life any longer. It's time to move forward.

See you later, $4050. I hope I see some of you again very soon. I'm going to need you for nursery furniture, I hope.

Last stop, getting these hamburgers....I mean embryos shipped and we are ready to rock and roll.