The wonderment of the unknown

As we embark onto this final FET cycle of 2013, I'm pondering all of possibilities ahead of us. Here are some of the things that have been bouncing around this brain of mine.

We have three embryos left. We plan to transfer two. At this point in time, it's unknown which two embryos will be transferred. We won't know which will be transferred until the transfer day itself due to the potential for embryos to arrest at thaw. Just to recap our embryo situation, we have the following remaining embryos -  each frozen as singles to straws: 

• One day-six blast from Vicky's batch (Romanian, olive skinned, dark haired.) But sadly, based on the way it was thawed, grown, and refrozen using slow freeze techniques, it's not expected to survive thaw.
• One day-six blast from Libby's batch (Blue eyed, fair skinned, blonde haired)
• One day-five blast from Libby's batch (also blue eyed, fair skinned, and blonde haired)

We have decided on the thawing order for the next transfer. The plan will be to start by thawing the day-six blast from the first batch (Vicky's) and the day-six from the second batch (Libby's.) If Vicky's embryo does not survive thaw, we will thaw the final day-five blast from Libby's batch. Follow me so far? You may have to read through that a few times since I know it is complicated! Sheesh. :)

Once all of that makes sense, let's consider the incredible possibilities if the one from Vicky's batch DOES survive thaw and we transfer it along with one from Libby's and I find that I am pregnant. Here are the two unusual scenarios that come to mind.

Scenario one:

Both embryos transferred implant and I end up with twins. Think about this one - I would be pregnant with twin babies who are neither genetically related to me NOR each other. Pretty amazing! I am not aware of anyone else who has been in this situation and I would bet is incredibly rare. I mentioned this on one of my online support groups and someone coined the term "twi-blings"! Cute!

Or....

Scenario two: 

Only one embryo implants leaving us with a singleton pregnancy. However, we'd have no idea which one implanted until after birth. We'd go the entire pregnancy not knowing if our baby grew from Libby's embryo or Vicky's. Of course after birth we would do a DNA test through a cheek swab so all parties involved would know which family he/she was genetically related to. And while many of you might be thinking this is just too crazy for words, I personally think it's a beautiful surprise to be faced with seeing how so many others have been robbed from us.

But of course, if the embryo from Vicky's batch doesn't survive thaw as we expect, we will be transferring the final two of Libby's and would know all along the genetic background in any outcome. But the possibilities and unknowns sure are interesting to think about as we embark on this final transfer! The wonders of modern science are amazing. 

And as mentioned before, if Vicky's embryo survives thaw, and we have that final 5AA rockstar embryo remaining from Libby's batch, we will save it for an attempt for a sibling down the road.

If the next FET fails or I miscarry again, we plan to pursue traditional domestic infant adoption at the start of 2014. This leaves us with a whole new set of unknown possibilities. Since we are open to the adoption of a child from any racial background, it's impossible to truly envision the child that we will someday call our own. When I lay our baby down in his/her crib, what color eyes will be staring back at me? What color skin will be pressed up against my chest as I read a bedtime story? Will I be braiding my little girl's long blonde locks of hair? Or will I be braiding the beautiful brown hair of an African-american child?  It's all the same in the end, and my heart bursts with joy as I think of any potential scenario.

I'm in awe at the wonderment of the possibilities. God knows the outcome and I can't wait to see what He has in store for us.

Photo courtesy of Newsone